On the outside the walls came down, the ideals withered, the the resistance crumbled, the hope failed. Stupidity, carelessness, sloppiness, and failure become cornerstones of the physical reality, accepted as the compromise of life. And yet, not.

On the inside the perfectionist remains stalwart in martyrdom, resolute to ostracize myself from social harms and foibles and weakness, inflexibly demanding nothing less than the best and still believing perfection is the only way to be. And yet, wishing not.